Beauty is not just skin deep .. Its soul deep !

There is a description of how a “Nayika” should be according to the veda of Dance .
Medium height , long hair , straight hair, sharp features , almond shaped eyes , delicate mannerism , slender arms ,short beautiful feet ornamented , very feminine
I never matched the majority in the checklist .
Tall , curly hair, peacock feet , enough reasons to disqualify myself from the standard format of the “Nayika” .
When reading the literature , it use to depress me a bit . the only thing I liked , and I didn’t fit it ? question :WHY
I was 9 that time
I was given the male roles ..height , body stature …. I have played prominent male characters . Ravana being very prominent , and a character I will remember .
People were like ou why would you want to be Ravan ! lol I found the argument to be vague .
I loved the character! It was the right blend . Right blend of Intellect without a direction , right blend of ego , anger , pride ,lust , ambition went overboard . Dramatic..Expressive ! At time , I felt as if I am the meanest person on the stage … I am ..The Ravana … It’s a character to be respected I feel !
After a certain time , I found that it didn’t matter to me . ….. whether I was fitting the grounds of a stereo typed nayika or not . I was happy ! Cuz I was not only the nayika , I was nayak , I was mother , I was Krishna at the same time I was Ravan , I was Shiv And at the same time I was Yashoda .I was Saraswati at the same time I was Amba , Kaali .I was Vishnu and I was Sheshnaag . I was Radha , Krishna’s Radha , madly in love with him …. Who loves to fight with him , loves to blame him , loves to love him …
I wasn’t beautiful just from one aspect … I was beautiful from every aspect. I felt the beauty in my soul. It really didn’t matter to me wat I was . all that mattered …was I was happy… I was feeling beautiful.. In the rhythm ..rhythm in me ….
Nothing mattered to me then , sadness , worry , happiness , remorse , devastation ,relations …nothing … there was only one moment of truth … that I was there …being in my rhythm ,in sync, feeling a splurge of happiness gushing through my gut & feeling so beautiful in my soul .
It a feeling that a infant experiences when the mother takes it in her arms , with both hands wrapped around it …..caressing it .. It a feeling that you are loved !
And it’s a priceless feeling !
Feeling beautiful …… doesn’t matter ..when you are into a totally different world ….where your priorities change …and focus is not on beauty but being aware !

Feeling :A boon

Its a boon to feel :)
Not in the corporate world ...
Who is bothered .. corporate is not life ... just a part of life :)

Its a boon to feel extremes ...
A lot of people are scared of their own emotions ... they make a conscious effort "not" to feel ... Tough guys hunh !
;)
:)

I dont understand whats so wrong to feel vulnerable .
I use to feel the same earlier ..... snub my emotions ... personal emotions ....but then one fine day ... i said to myself .. why am I doing this ? and for who ? who is that person I want to fool ? myself ?

Feelings are a part of me .. its about how I am feeling at that very moment . Why am I snubbing it ? do i like it when somebody else snubs when i express my feelings to him/her ? NO the question is , then why I am doing this to myself at the very first place ? :) why did I give that right to myself first ? :) its wrong :) i should respect my feelings first ... and then .. the rest does not actually matters .. probably thats how you dont bother about expecting .. may be ..

If i feel love .. overflowing .. I acknowledge it ... i say .. I dont know past ... I dont know future .. i know ... RIGHT NOW ... I feel love ..n the moment is priceless ...result .. smile ... ear to ear sometimes , a trickle of happiness from the eye :) :) :)

When I feel angry , I acknowledge it ... I babble unwanted things .. shout , scream ...... and I say to myself .. I will shout .. i will scream reason being I AM ANGRY ! .....and once i acknowledge it ...be in it ... it gets out of head ... and everything is a calm ocean :)

When I feel devastated .. i acknowledge it ... i accept that I feel bad .. its ok to feel bad ... its ok to feel that things are not going around are pinching you ... you are hurt .. feel the hurt ... in your heart .. n let it out from your eyes ......


Every feeling that you feel .. is your own ... dont disown it :) its your own baby .... its just needs your acknowledgment ..... thats the best way to care for it .. n gradually , it would subside :) very lovingly ..
This is something that i would like to call ..emotional cleansing .. which is utmost necessary !

We make the biggest mistake in life .. keep snubbing what we feel and follow the ridiculous rule "BE HAPPY" . & we follow it so religiously that we dont even realize when we start faking it !
:)
In the most break down situations ... you keep snubbing your feeling ... example sad/remorse/devastation and be presentable all the time ,a happy face to the world .. talk , act out to yourself and at the end .. you end up crying like a baby while watching a funny comedy movie :)
:) :) :) and you start feeling so YUCK abt yourself and say ..what the fuck have you being doing to yourself all this time :) :) :)



Be yourself .... feel what you feel like whenever cuz you are ..at the end of the day a human being :)

THEN ... you ll be happy

Everything will pass by ... happiness , joy , love , sadness, tensions , nothing stays ...

:)

Somethings , although , do last forever :) and for that ......."forever" has to come from within oneself ....and then its just :) Forever :) :) :)

I have learnt it today .. i have felt it today :) from a very very darling friend of mine who is a total sweetheart ! M blessed to have such good souls around me .. :) seriously :) I wish all the happiness in the world for that sweet soul ! :)


Feeling is one of the greatest things God has blessed us with ... And all the more He has blessed us with the power to emote ... this is where He has shown his bias of love towards human beings ...words ,actions ,gestures :) ... how often do we acknowledge it ?

:)

He is a master mind sitting up there :) ... no matter how many physics chemistry we keep applying .. His mechanics are the greatest .... so great that you can never understand .. and why do you want to ? He is there to take care of it ....

Keep feeling ...... keep loving ....keep being "Happy" in the true sense of the word and be a reason for others to be happy and spread the same message :)